Understanding DARVO: The Insidious Tactic of Perpetrators

In the realm of abusive relationships and toxic dynamics, a disturbing pattern often emerges: the perpetrator employs a cunning tactic known as DARVO to deflect blame and gaslight the victim. This acronym stands for "Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender," and it's a powerful form of manipulation that can leave victims feeling confused, doubted, and even blamed for the abuse they've endured.

What is DARVO?

DARVO is a three-step strategy employed by perpetrators to evade accountability and shift the narrative in their favor. Here's how it unfolds:

Deny

The perpetrator begins by denying any wrongdoing or minimizing the severity of their actions. They may claim that the victim is exaggerating or misinterpreting the situation, sowing seeds of doubt in the victim's mind.

Attack

After denying the allegations, the perpetrator goes on the offensive, attacking the victim's credibility, character, or mental state. They may accuse the victim of being irrational, oversensitive, or even the true aggressor in the situation.

Reverse Victim and Offender

In the final stage, the perpetrator attempts to cast themselves as the true victim, portraying the original victim as the abusive party. This reversal of roles is a devastating form of gaslighting, leaving the victim questioning their own reality and potentially feeling guilty or responsible for the abuse they've endured.

Recognizing DARVO in Action

DARVO can manifest in various contexts, from intimate partner violence to workplace harassment, and even in broader societal issues. Here are some examples of how this tactic can play out:

- A perpetrator of domestic abuse denies hitting their partner, accuses the partner of provoking them, and claims they were acting in self-defense.

- A company accused of discriminatory practices denies any wrongdoing, attacks the credibility of the accusers, and portrays itself as the victim of a smear campaign.